Friday, May 22, 2009
Okay, I started this blog to get serious about my health/body issues. I was hovering at 10 lbs. above my personal ideal weight. I managed to lose a pound or two, then I managed to find them, plus an additional 5.6 since February. To be honest, I've been feeling increasingly demotivated since the holidays. Don't know if it was the weather, economy, personal issues or most likely a combination that made it impossible to get energy or enjoyment from almost anything. I stopped going to WW last year because I was obsessing over the weigh-ins, feeling like I couldn't figure out how to go to the meetings (which I personally needed) without feeling like I didn't belong there, or feeling like I was being asked by the leader for my opinion on every question. I just wanted to be anonymous (invisible), and the WW leader wasn't letting me. Instead of addressing that - I quit.
So, almost a year and a half later, I finally decided to go back. At 5.6 pounds above my WW goal weight. And even though I know some people would think that was an OK weight, I was still embarrassed to go back. My leader congratulated me on coming back - I wish I came back sooner. I lost 3.2 lbs. the first week and 1 lb. this week. Now that I'm withing 2 lbs. of my goal weight, meetings are free again.
What brought me back: Diabetes and obesity. In my family, if you don't have one, or the other, or both; you're heading there. I know plenty of folks can eat sugar/simple refined carbs with no effects. That is not me. Not only does it make me feel crappy when I have it, but it starts a cycle of sugar craving that literally lasts for weeks. I really think that it's pretty selfish of me to consciously engage in a behavior that's almost guaranteed to result in chronic disease. So, If I take a few steps down another path, maybe I'll be able to go a bit longer without the disease or doctors and medication.
This week I'm focusing on: tracking what I'm eating. That's it. I'm not into counting points and all of that. I prefer Weight Watchers CORE plan (now called Simply Filling or SiFi for WW nerds), it focuses on less processed foods and eating mindfully. I've also been doing 30 minutes of yoga most days for the last month or so - the difference in my flexibility is really noticeable. I've never been able to sit comfortably in full lotus, but in the last couple of weeks I've been able to sit comfortably for increasingly longer periods of time. This was my motivation for increasing my yoga practice.
So, do you have any advice for sticking with the program, or in making changes in general? Anyone else feel crappy about 'falling off the wagon' with diet and exercise?